For a little change of pace tonight, I went to my friend's house to watch the show.  She's an AI virgin and I thought it'd be great to see the show through fresh eyes.  So, without further ado.

Fashion Extra:

Ryan's hair is extra spikey tonight. Is that a plaid silver suit? Oh, Ryan. You're like the worst closet gay ever.

Mimi! Dressed like Sandy from Grease.

David Archuleta - When You Believe

He's sooo cute. What was he wearing and why didn't it match what he was singing at all? Really? (On the commercial break, Fox promised dirt on the AI kid who's dating on of the SYTYCDancers.  My AI virgin and I prayed it was Danny and D'Archie.  Are we going to hell?)  Cartoon ballad from the Moses movie? Please, please sing an up tempo song. You have a beautiful voice and it was lovely performance. Just one fast song, though, please, before the end.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: "He has a pretty voice, but he's really boring." True. True.

Carly Smithson - I Can't Live (If Livin' Is Without You)

Ok, this is NOT a Mariah song. Yes, she covered it. But so did twenty-leven million other people. Cheater, cheater song repeater. She was really straining on those big belt-y notes. Y'all, I think, much like Ramiele, she actually doesn't have a big, belt-y diva voice. Randy's right. She did kinda slide into the pitch there at the beginning. Wow, that was actually very cogent criticism. Well, one good point, she looks the best she's ever looked on the show. Ever.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: Well, actually she didn't say anything. Halfway through the song she got up and went to the kitchen to go order us some take out burgers and then she went to check on what her cat was doing. (Peeing in the litter box, for all those interested).

Syesha Mercado - Vanishing

I love this song. When I was 19, I totally wanted this song to be sung at my funeral. Also, why was she dressed as a disco queen singing a song about someone dying and you losing them and missing them so much? But, wow, she really sang it well. And that last little bit. Even Mariah doesn't do it better. That's the best she's done in weeks.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: "She has a church voice. Brava, young one. Brava. She's done well."

We were also impressed with Paula's critique. Very lucid and a good comeback to Simon.

Why is Brooke dressed like a 70's disco queen?

Brooke White - Hero

Love how Mariah was like, "You should do X. Oh, that's what you were doing . . . you were doing that? Oh, ok." Well, she was completely off pitch there at the beginning. Kinda got it back there and then on the bridge, oh and then . . . lost it again completely. Oh my goodness, y'all. She was shaking like a leaf. In that close up, she looked terrified through the whole thing. What has happened to our Little Miss Sunshine? Agreed with Randy again.

Thus spake the Idol Virgin: "What is this? Why can't she sing? Oh, she's shaking. That's sad." Harsh.

Kristy Lee Cook - Forever

Mariah lies just as much as Paula. Ok, the beginning was way too low for her already suspect lower register. She was starting to pull it out once she got to the chorus, trying to country it out, but as soon as she got back to the verse it was right back to being in the wrong key. WTF, Kristy Lee? Why not just transpose the song into the right key? The choruses will save her, because the verses sucked tremendous amounts of ****.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: In the bathroom. Left after the first couple of notes of the first verse. She came out when Randy was praising Kristy for ending the song well and said "Don't lie, Randy." True, true.

David Cook - Always Be My Baby

I've already said all that I'll ever have to say about D. Cook, so I'll let my Idol Virgin take it away.

Thus spake the Idol virgin: "I don't mind the rearrangement. I'm more offended by the fact that he can't sing. Has he even hit one note?" And the answer to that was, as usual, no. Do I have to say how much I hated this? Let's move along

Jason Castro - I Don't Wanna Cry

Idol virgin says he's yummy and beautiful. I heartily concur. I enjoy what he did with the song, although his voice has sounded better. And great googly moogly, he's pretty. This was actually a good song choice for him. And he managed to turn it into his usual kaffe klatsch joint.

Overall, I thought the singing was actually really good tonight. Best of the night by far for me was actually Syesha. I KNOW! Aside from D. Cook who is always bringing up the rear, worst of the night was Carly (with Brooke not far behind - poor duckling!). Kristy was forgettable. David was boringly brilliant. Jason was same as it ever was. Big take away from the night - Syesha really can sing.

So I admit that we did take a break to have yummy turkey burgers and garlic fries.  (Yay, Tivo!)  Then after our break, I actually had to look up the song list to remind myself what Jason and Kristy actually sang. It's just, they're all so predictable this season. Every single D'Archie performance (with the exception of the Stevie train wreck) has been a carbon copy of his performance this week. Brooke and Jason always sound like the fifth track on the Starbucks CD, no matter what the genre or what song they are singing. D. Cook always takes his songs to the emo nightmare place. And Syesha and Carly are gonna go all belt-y diva. I mean, every season, the kids have their boxes, but I remember greater diversity in seasons past.

And the kids continue to be absolutely charm free.  Suffice it to say, I did not make a convert.  However, I do give Syesha a fair chance to survive the week, which I wouldn't have done before the show.  I'm betting Kristy Lee's robot masters may finally recall her this week, or mabe Carly or Brooke for a second week of "shocking" boots.