Chicago: We're more than pizza. Really.

I decided to watch the first episode of Top Chef for one reason: I wanted to see how long it would take before they had to do a pizza challenge. And lo and behold, I didn't have to wait long because the very first Quickfire challenge was to make a personalized version of a Chicago deep-dish pizza. Yummy.

Unfortunately, a lot of things went wrong, including not realizing how much dough rises in an oven (seriously, folks!) and some botched ingredients. When presented to guest judge Rocco DiSpirito, somehow, a MARMITE PIZZA was in the top 8. Let me repeat that for you: A PIZZA with MARMITE beat out at least 8 other pizzas. Do you know how bad your pizza has to be for it to lose to marmite? Really, really bad.

The elimination challenge paired a chef from the top 8 with one from the bottom 8 and made them do updated versions of 'classic' dishes, and then the judges would pick a winner from each pair. Ok, am I the only one who had no idea what a "chicken picatta" is? Neither of the chefs that took it knew either, it seems, but can it really be classic if I've never heard of it? AND I'm a Food Network junkie?

And then there were the souffl??s. Somehow, the two chefs who had souffles hadn't made one in nearly 20 years. Is that common? Because I would think that souffle making is a pretty standard skill to keep around given it's various applications (dessert to name one. Yum.) Regardless, the judges, including awesome guest judge Anthony Bourdain, were left in a position where it wasn't so much as deciding which was the better souffle, but which wasn't totally gross and disgusting. That's a great criticism for your first challenge.

In the end, the victory went to Stephanie, who made a great duck a l'orange. And the loser was Nimma, who in an earlier interview said "I'm a Muslim woman who shouldn't be here with all these unmarried men, but I want to cook a lot too." and chose to go to sleep early the first night instead of eating with her fellow contestants. Frankly, I am not sad to see her go.

Oh! Before I forget, apparently two of the chefs are a lesbian couple. Exciting? Doubt it.